Judgement or Discernment? How To Tell The Difference.

There is a difference between judgement and discernment and in a world obsessed with positivity, I think it’s important to understand the difference. Especially when we are naming what is out of alignment and speaking our truth.

Judgement arises from ego and separation. It is about making the other wrong in order to make ourselves right. It seeks to protect the self through superiority, blame or righteousness. It is reactive and rigid and often rooted in unprocessed pain.

It says:

That person is bad. I am better.

I need to be right.

I will condemn and exclude.

Discernment arises from presence, reflection and integrity.  It is about perceiving what is true and responding in ways that honor the self. Discernment is not about blame. It is about boundaries. It is recognising when something is not safe or is out of alignment with our values.

It says:

I can see clearly what aligns and what does not.

I can remain in my own integrity as I name what needs to be named.

I will not stay silent where harm is being done.

To say “ I need to walk away from this situation because the person is out of integrity is not judgement, it is discernment.”

Judgement divides.

Discernment protects.

Judgement shames.

Discernment illuminates.

Judgement says “ I am better”.

Discernment says “This is not aligned”.

And how do we know which one we are in - Judgement or Discernment?

Pause and feel.

Judgement will often leave a charge - a spike of self-righteousness, contraction in the body. 

It wants to shame and seperate.

When we are in judgement we are often speaking at or about someone else.

There is a strong sense of right and wrong, good and bad, black and white.

Discernment, though it may feel fierce, leaves a deeper feeling of steadiness and can come with a sense of grief for what could be better. 

It moves us toward reflection, truth and responsibility - not superiority.

When we are in discernment , we are speaking for care, integrity and truth.

Discernment is an act of care and it is an ongoing practice which asks us to stay close to our values and boundaries, while remembering the shared humanity of those around us.

And in today’s fast-paced, noisy world - where reactions spread faster than reflection - knowing the difference between judgment and discernment has never been more important.

Discernment asks us to slow down.

To pause.

And to think for ourselves.