What's The Difference Between Extraction and Expansion? How Do We Unhook Ourselves From The Unconscious Pace Of Depletion?

We don’t always realise that we are living in a state of extraction.

It can feel like “that’s just how life is”.

Fast and full and scattered.

A subtle hum of urgency that is always driving us.

Always moving and trying to keep up.

It can feel like pressure.

Tight.

Urgent.

This way of living quite often leads to burnout - and - it’s not our fault!

Most of us live in a culture of extraction without even realising it. 

This is the water we are swimming in, so it just seems normal, but it is unconsciously driving us (and depleting us).

Extraction isn’t always loud.

It can look enthusiastic and busy and always on.

It can feel like being stretched so thin that you forget what you even care about.

So much of it is unconscious.

Inherited.

Marketed as ambition, success, relevance.

And yet deep down - we know that we are being pulled away from ourselves.

This is why naming extraction matters.

So we can wake up to what is important in our lives, instead of being caught in the rush and hustle and living on the surface.

What Is Extraction?

Extraction is giving without replenishment.

We live in a world that confuses output with worth.

It’s a system - cultural, economic, even spiritual - that asks more of us than we can sustainably offer.

It’s the pressure to be visible, valuable and “on”all the time.

It’s care, commodified.

It’s transactional care over relational care.

It’s hustle, disguised as healing.

It’s workplaces that reward burnout and penalise slowness for profit.

It’s saying yes when you mean no.

We get used to extracting from ourselves to stay relevant and in the game.

What Is Expansion?

Expansion is about becoming more present and more resourced.

It is not about doing more.

It is about creating from inspiration and enoughness not from fear or scarcity.

It is about having boundaries and using our discernment - not just getting on the Choo-choo train of more for the sake of more.

It is having support systems in place to honour your capacity and nervous system. You do not have to keep up with the systems that are burning you out.

You can choose differently even if it’s counter-cultural.

In real life, the difference looks like this:

* Extraction is performance

   Expansion is presence

* Extraction is speed and scarcity

   Expansion is spaciousness and sustainability 

* Extraction drains

   Expansion nourishes

* Extraction is often unconscious

   Expansion is a choice we make

And if we don’t name it, we can’t change it.

And if we don’t change it, we burn out - personally and collectively - wondering what the hell is wrong with us.

But there is another way - if we choose it.

In my new book, The Duty Of Care, I explore what it means to lead, heal, and serve in a way that is relational, ethical and regenerative.

And in my new offering Wholly Abundant, we dive into what it means to live from prosperity consciousness - not the kind that is sold to us through “manifestation culture”, but the kind rooted in reverence, reciprocity, and enoughness.

The world will always offer us extractive ways but we don’t have to keep saying yes to those ways.

We are not machines for content, output, or perfection.

We were not designed to live in a constant state of urgency.

We are meant to ebb and flow.

To give and receive in ways that are life-giving - not depleting.

May we choose presence.

May we choose our own pace.

May we give ourselves permission to slow down - without feeling guilty or irrelevant.

May we all feel resourced, replenished and rooted in enoughness.

May we all reclaim a way of living, working, and serving that doesn’t cost us our health or wholeness.

Which will you choose for yourself ?